I hear you call out for me..
I hate to see the pain...
I want to help you,
but how can you help someone,
When they don't want to help themselves.
How can I take this pain away...
When you are the one that has to stop the pain,
Then it, will set it free...
It's time for you to let go,
Can't you see...
Cause look what it is doing to you my dear,
& to your family...
The pain you have held within,
You see...
It's making you go crazily...
Stop hurting yourself,
Stop hurting me,
Stop hurting your baby...
Can't you see,
What it is doing to you my dear...
It's time for you to gradually,
Set yourself free...
& be who you are meant to be.....

Get up in the morning,
Frustration...
Everything is suffocating me,
Frustration...
Why do I behave they way I do,
Frustration...
It's driving me crazy,
Frustration...
So were do I begin without this,
Frustration...
By loving me!!!
& to forgive myself & to others,
that have hurt me so...
Stop this hatred & this pain I hold within...
Please set me free...
Let me be free...
The person I used to be....
Let me feel the love inside of me,
The way I used to be...
Take this pain, guilt, frustration, lies & hatred away from me...
I just want to be free...

I woke up after a dream....
Why do I have these dreams....
My sister tells me, I should write them down...
But I don't want to read about that same dream, 
in my thoughts consistently...
But I do anyway... 
Running through my thoughts, consistently...
My mind goes to pain at first,
Why?
Because of pain of lost....?
The lost of my children, the lost of my love, 
my heart....
But in the end no matter what, 
there is always a ending.
There's no denying that......

I need to find another way expressing,
not by speaking...
Express it to myself, as what I am doing right now...
Express within, express to me, 
let it come out naturally...
Don't hold it within,
express it to me, myself & I.......
Who else do I need... 
I need to learn to trust within, love within...
Let me be there,
let me feel that pain from those fingers tips,
express, let it go, let it go.....
Let them talk your thoughts,
don't be scared were here for you.
You always had yourself to begin with...
But lost yourself, you need to pick yourself up..
Bring you back to reality....
You can only find it,
within.......

Sometimes I just want to flee, run & just keep running...
But running is all I ever knew....
But when I was running I was free...
Free from the pain...
But I'm leaving something behind who are the world to me, the universe my life....
My family....

It's over cast,
It's cloudy,
Is it going to rain?
Let the new year begin with the rain.
Wash away all the pain & struggles,
people endure through out the years.
Let this be the year...
The year of letting go,
The year of peace,
The year of starting fresh,
The year of forgiveness,
The year of change,
The year of learning,
Let this year be free.
Let this be the year....

I sit here typing my thoughts....
Reading my thoughts
Listening silently....
It's so nice to hear silence....
It's comforting,
It's peaceful,
There's a calmness, surrounding me....
I feel content,
I feel at peace....
This is the way life should be...
Why do we let those people in....
To cloud us with there unhappiness,
There pain, anger, problems 
They endure within....
Why do we let them in......
You give them your love, your heart, your kindness....
To let them feel again....
For them to take it all away again,
that goodness you have within.
Why do that,
To yourself.....
Why let them take it all from us,
For it to start the rain again,
& cloud us with there pain....
We are stronger then that,
We are better then that,
We know better then that,
So why do we let them in.......

Why do people have to hurt?
Why do people let them...
Why do people hang onto pain
Why don't people let it go...
Why do we do these things, 
to ourselves & to others...
There's more to life then that...
Why don't we love ourselves enough
This is the issue with us all...
Can't you see.
How can you see,
When you have to much pain & anger,
Deep down inside of you & your family...
Why don't we change it to love & generosity...
To ourselves & to others....
Then when we do, our lives will fill with happiness 
& that's the life we want for you & your family....
So....
Change your ways....
Open your heart & let the love & generosity....
Come flooding through....
Can you see it now,
Can you feel it now....
That's the way life should be right now,
With the love & generosity....

It's getting late...
It's time to sleep...
It's time to go to bed...
But so much is going through my head...
Someone is calling out to me...
Save me, save me, save me...
I go to help
But get yelled, instead..
As I try to help.
Because it's not the way you want it to be.
But sometimes,
In life things don't work out,
the way you want it to be...
So if you don't like your life your living in..
Well it's time for you to change it, my dear.
So close your eyes & go to sleep...
For tomorrow will be the way it should be.
Unless you want to change it, my dear.
So in the end it's up to you,
To for fill your needs & dreams.
To bring you back to reality,
But for now it's time for you to go to sleep,
It's getting late,
It's time for bed...
So close your eyes,
& rest that wary head......
For tomorrow is a new day, my dear.
It's time for you to save yourself...
& live life h-a-p-p-i-l-y.....
The way it should be.....
So close your eyes,
Sleep well my dear.
It's getting late...
It's time to sleep...
It's time to go too B-E-D....
So sweet dreams, my d-e-a-r.....
& live your life h-a-p-p-i-l-y.....

It's raining once again,
You feel the pain,
Don't you..?
That's why it's started to rain again...
Because you feel my pain.
As the water rise higher....
I fill up, with all this negativity...
I'm waiting for the water to rise, high enough.
For it to flood.
So the water will flood,
over this pain, inside of me...  
To be able to set me free....
No more tears of sadness & pain...
It's time for me to feel the joy & laughter again....
I had inside of me,
The way I use to be....
Please give me the strength,
To over come this flood of pain...
That I have tried to tame...
But it is so hard to do,
With all this negativity, surrounding me...
It's time for me to close my eyes...
& say these beautiful words,
To me....
I am beautiful
I am free
I am in love with me....
Only the truth will set me free...
So set me free...
Fill me up, 
with love & honesty...
Because I was told the truth will set me free..
So let this be true & set me free to all honesty....

I lay here in my bed alone.
I lay here reading alone.
How do I feel?
Alone....
Is this good or is this bad...?
To some it's good..
To some it's bad.
But for me it is fine.....
I like the silence surrounding me...
I like to hear the nature, the elements, the animals, surrounding me...
All creatures great & small...
But there is a time, to make some noise
Is this good or is this bad....?
To some it's good.
To some it's bad.
But for me it is fine...
If that's what makes you feel the need...
So make that sound indeed...
Scream it out,
Say it loud...
Say it soft...
Say it the way, you want it to be...
But don't hold back, let it out....
Put your trust in me...
It's okay, let it out,
The way you want it to be...
Because it is fine with me....